bleed

seeing all the pain, and reminding me of the hurt it gonna be i tell myself that no way i will be stepping in it because there is no guy in this world that can fucking believe in. And yes, my heart is dead.

school work is killing me i got no motivation to continue on, been asking myself what am i going to do when im out of this school? join the filming industry and start off as a producer assistance? but is this what i want, i still can't decide yet.

and how many days that i've not been seeing my parents? Today, 2nd june is my brother's birthday, so are we going to have a dinner and each of us will be eating in our own room, or sitting down together in the kitchen having a steamboat, or going out together to have a dinner? brother are the one who passing messages between me and mother, the clothes on the bed are stacking higher and higher, i hate it when the time past day by day, me and mummy are still not talking.

Imagine, i hug my mother every night saying i love you to her every night, and when the cold war came we behaving like stranger. it's hurting me so much.

and today i heard something that disappointed me quite a lot. sigh.

i just want to rant that's all i don't care goodnight.